Attack of the Heavenly 9-Tongued Nezha !!

3-Head-6-Armed Nezha

 I've always had an interest in looking at the small differences in the human condition. Differences which we use to brand and label each other. We assign labels to each other based on color, gender, beliefs, geo-political origins, outward appearances, and language. We love to find little differences between us and focus on them and then fragment into small groups and develop rivalries over these differences. These rivalries can lead to arguments, fights, and sadly...wars.

To avoid future wars, it might be important to stop obsessing over our little differences. For people who are concerned over this, I find it's always a good idea to have some rhetorical claims handy to use as counter points when talking to people who hate-on a group of people over some small little thing.

For example, if you are dealing with a someone who dislikes others over the color of their skin. You can tell that person that the color of a person's skin/eyes/hair is entirely based on the level of melanin in their bodies and that the level of melanin has no impact on the intelligence or abilities of said person. Hopefully, they will realize that hating people over varying levels of melanin is silly and abandon the idea.

If someone is hating-on over geographic location, you can bring up how we are all on the same rock travelling through the universe...a universe which is limitless. Hopefully, they realize the scope of things and will abandon the idea that someone from a certain region of earth is bad for being from that region.

A tongue designed for other purposes

When dealing with language, you have to break it down to simple terms as well...

Language is latin for the word "tongue" and is how we use our smelly old tongues as tools to communicate a need/want/emotion to other human persons or animals. We all want to communicate with others and the more ways you can manipulate your tongue to rap out words the better.

When someone is hating-on over language you can try this rhetorical claim out for size...

Our brains are a very powerful organism and have a great capacity to hold data. The part of the brain that handles language has enough room on its organic hard drive to store an unlimited amount of vocabulary, and an unlimited amount of languages and regional dialects. Do we have to fight over which language is better when it is 100% possible to learn ALL languages? If you don't have the time in your tight schedule, no worries either, translation programs are getting better and better every day and researchers are adding more languages into their code as we speak. Let computers do all the legwork, and then reap the data reward.

Don't believe me that you could learn ALL languages if you tried? Here are some examples of Polyglots (dudes/dudettes who could rap in a lot of languages) over the years:


Hugo Masing (Wiki Page)

Hugo "The Amasing" Masing was a grand daddy of tongues, the man could bust out lyrics in over 40 tongues.

Known to his close friends and family as "Uku," his mastery of tongues allowed him to communicate with close to any hearing-able human.



Giuseppe Caspar Mezzofanti (Wiki Page)

Joey is listed by the wikipedia folks as being a "hyper-polyglot" which sounds cool. He poly got a lot of crackers! He could walk into a bar in China, order a beer and hit on a few waitresses in perfect Chinese. He could lay down some dozens with some cats in Istanbul in perfect Turkish. He could ask for his money back in a restaurant in Germany in perfect German. He could swear at a guy in Spanish. He could serenade a chick in Italian...etc. etc. etc.

José Protacio Rizal Mercado y Alonzo Realonda (Wiki Page)

JPRMyAR was a Filipino guy and the Manny Pacquiao of verbal communication (if you will).

When you reach the state of Hyper Tongue you become a veritable 9-Tongued Nezha and the whole world becomes your home. Pretty slick, eh?

Conclusion:

enlarge for FAIL

Most people have tongues, some had them removed, which is very sad. Some have one tongue (with two lips and two lungs I'd assume), some have two tongues, and some like Masing and Mezzofanti had so many tongues they were nothing but tongue.

If you only speak one tongue (sadly I have not mastered even one language as of yet, but I'm trying), please don't fall in love with your tongue. Falling in love with a part of your body is simply narcissistic and gross, it's like people who fall in love with their stupid hand and masturbate all day. People who fall in love with their own tongue are basically putting their heads between their legs, jamming their tongue around/in their genitals and giving themselves oral sex...then when they open their mouth to speak to others they spew out genital breath all over their audience.

I think the Great Sage, Lester Napoleon Green, said it best...

"Anyone can have a tongue, it doesn't matter what tongue you got. You can use anybody's tongue..."

Words of the wise.