Alright, let's turn the page on that Light Out story which took me four different portions to finish. It had a fitting ending in the style of Lights Out to conform to the homage material but I had to make a second funner ending because I'm a happy ending sort of person.
That was fun to write that. I was really into the whole Lights Out thing to make that. I listened to all the Lights Outs and captured its essence for that homage story... and that's some heavy material too... If I would have ended my story on the heavy ending it would have been more accurate to the task I assigned myself... but my alternate ending is more fitting to my worldviews, I'd say. I'm a very Ghostbuster-centered individual as some of you might know.
And now for something completely different.
Yes, let's detach ourselves mentally from the World of the fantastic and themes of Halloween spookiness to give the bronze, silver, and gold medals for Twitter as this blog has done a few years in a row, now.
Previous installments:
2019 Twitter Awards
2018 Twitter Awards
Now, let's remind our readers that there's no methodology to this award. If anyone mentioned finds this through searching and thinks this is some official thing, don't, because it is just the fourth article I've written about Twitter feeds that I find humorous... and the awarding of the medals is based on one person's opinion.
As stated in the 2019 article... I don't want to write the same article twice... so if you were already a winner of a medal... it's unlikely you will be eligible again. If I really just gave my favorite Twitter feeds medals every year then Jose Canseco, Iron Sheik, George Wallace, Norm Macdonald, Gregg Turkington, and a handful of others would just win every year and the articles would get redundant.
I still believe it's either Iron Sheik or George Wallace as being the truly best Twitter Feed of all time.
This year, I'm adding a caveat that will change the article drastically, and that's... it will be Young Celebrities featured here as the bronze, silver, and gold medal recipients. Now, the reason for this, is the following...
...I was thinking, that now that I'm not like a spring chicken anymore, and I'd say of the famous people I know of, 5/10 of those celebrities I've heard of are deceased... and the other 5/10 are all from the 1900s era... knowing this, I came to the realization that in 15 years I will know of ZERO celebrities. The other half of celebrities I've heard of and care about will join the other half outside of the world of the living.
So...
...I feel I need to venture into the Young People World, even though, at times, it frightens me... and I do not understand it very well. If I don't ... I am sure by 2035... I will no longer know of any living celebrity.
The caveat for this year's awards are that the recipients must be "Young" and young is flexible... it just means you can't be like "Old"... you have to be like under 35 to be eligible for these awards. This is the Under-35 Twitter Awards this year!
A running theme in the previous three articles was Jose Canseco finished fourth just out of the medals each time... he doesn't meet the new rule... and cannot be considered this year.
I tried to make the selections diverse... but I had three in mind since last week... and I'm gonna go with the three finalists I had in mind. It's not as diverse a selection as I would have liked it to be but c'est la vie.
I was looking at some areas of the comedy world for a female selection in the finals to try and make it more diverse...
I was looking into the ASMR world, for a female finalist, which has a lot of talented female web creators and some have innate comedic talent that could land them in an article about The Young Guns of Future Celebrity Talent.
The ASMR world is still filed in the niche and possibly "bizarre" portion of the internet, though still. I mean the shtick varies from light relaxation techniques, to brazen women sucking their expensive microphones like Popsicles (or Iced Lollies if you live over-seas), to creators who create a full-out universe of diverse and interesting characters. In the comedy world, I am more interested in the third area, the diverse universe of interesting humorous characters.
I didn't really settle on one. I think there's a lot of uniquely talented comedy women in this niche genre if you manage to wade through all the popsicle licking and hippie-dippie stuff. I would even suggest, a big show like SNL, who needs to check off diversity entries to create a roster of talent... should be scouting the ASMR world for female talent. One of the pre-requisites for being hired for Saturday Night Live is to have a bevy of bizarre yet original characters that you created and can preform. There's talent in the ASMR world that meets this requirement of creating odd original characters.
I think SNL's main method for scouting for talent is sending people to clubs like Chicago's Second City improv club, which I remember going to once many years ago, but I think there's a lot of talent out there that can't be found through the old scouting methods. I can say with certainty that there's comedically talented females in the ASMR video genre that are much funnier than the standard SNL cast member.
One character, a female character, I was thinking of shoeing in this article was not from the ASMR world but just the internet in general.. I remember reading this article going around the British tabloids about this young lady who spoke "Fluent American" and how she thought Britain is "closer to the sun" than America is... I mean... to make a video that gets the Over-Seas all Up-in-Arms and lands yourself in full Heat and gets millions of views and not even really care takes some measure of talent and ability. I don't think this character is active on the internet anymore ... I'm searching for the article... and it seems it was a one-shot character that's inactive now a days.
That young woman from that silly video has more comedic talent at her age than most people will ever achieve throughout their entire lives. It seems to be a character called "Pupinia"... which if that's the name her parents gave her... she was probably destined from day one to be humorous in some fashion. It seems inactive now this character so we can't really shoe it in to this 2020 Young Guns award article.
Okay, so, I couldn't make the article as diverse as possible but what can we do... let's begin.
The Finalists for this Year's 2020 Under-35 Twitter Awards are:
-Brendan and Corey
-Conner O'Malley
-Nick Lutsko
All of these Twitter stars are under thitry five years old (I think, I'm quite sure anyways)... and are quite famous for their comedy... and are good and I like them.
I am still undecided on who's being awarded the Gold Medal... so let's start with the Bronze... and then I'll make the decision after that. I am torn between two of these for who deserves the Gold more... it's closer than you think... I'm not making it up to build suspense.
Bronze
Brendan and Corey! The duo from Branchburg, New Jersey pull out the bronze in this year's Young Guns Twitter awards.
I've seen each of their work, but, the video that really made me laugh and everything seems to be a Corey-only one... but... the video showcased in this article doesn't mean I want to take away anything from the duo who are great and have good chemistry as a tag-team. I saw this video the other week or so and I found it to be above the morass as the older fellows used to say back in the day:
"I Suppose My Behavior Has Isolated Me"
This video, is well made. They can get a lot out of very little. It's simple. This video is just a voice-over, a guy filming, and a guy walking around who wants to be ant. I relate to this guy... you know... we laugh at this but... ants get so much done with even way much littler than we can ever imagine. It's an efficient and industrious creature, it is. I know in the Young People world you can be whatever you want now a days... like boys can be girls, and girls can be boys, etc... but why stop at gender? If this guy wants to be an ant then why can't he?
I find a real uniqueness to their stuff.... I wonder who their influences are... but then again with total absurdity as this... the whole point is not to have too many influences. Could it be Jacques Cousteau meets Gary Larson with a touch of Jack Handey? Is that a good comparison? Not really. It's original is what it is so you can't compare it to too much.
This is just one example of their work... they have many videos on their youtube channel. They get the Bronze and as the youngest entry of The Young Guns they will probably be around for a while doing their bits which is nice.
Even though it's absurd ... it's subversively intelligent, I find. There is a theme of young people who feel strange trying to fit into a society that they don't fully understand. I think there's some interesting opinions they have which comes through the comedy they preform. It is dealing with the human condition and real emotions even though at the surface it appears as complete nonsense. I think they are very talented young people.
I don't know their exact ages but it's probably early to mid twenties, I guess. That's some pretty profound stuff for that age. High ceiling here.
Silver (is this font visible? It says "silver" in silver)
Nick Lutsko! Damn, I gotta look up his name each time I write this. I wonder if it's pronounced Nick Let's Go! This guy gives me a Let's Go! sort of feeling with his musical numbers. He's got some real edge... like a punk rock edge, I'd say.
People say Punk is dead but... watching this guy hit a fever pitch with the sweat and the veins popping out of his face... I'm calling it right now society... Punk's NOT dead, okay?
I like a lot of his comedy yet edgy Let's Go! type of songs but the one being showcased here below is "Where Did The Gremlins Go?" which is good enough to win a Grammy award let alone a Blog No One Cares About Award...
"Where Did The Gremlins Go?"
All his songs are very catchy and by the middle of them he gets Into It. Like, no joke, he seriously gets in to his song. I've seen like hundreds of rock and roll concerts and it's rare to see someone who gets really this passionate about their material... he trusts his stuff... he knows its good. He knows his words are meaningful and intense. I mean, I say punk is alive, seeing this... and I mean that. It's not just some platitude to eat space in an article... I mean that.
When he does the slow piano version of "The RNC Theme Song" ... he's going from intense to mellow to somber to out-of-control to thoughtful in the span of a few minutes. I mean, this isn't a joke his musical talent... yet he devotes this talent to the Comedy world... which is amazing.
On top it all.... on top of the intense style, the comedy, on top of all of this... everything he's saying in the Gremlins song is TRUE! Every word of it is true! We could have, as a society (if society was normal and not backwards) we COULD have had all these things. We could have had a Jaws-like Gremlin! We could have had a Gremlins 3 where Gizmo isn't into the new branched-off society his Gremlin peers created after the rebellion and had a child with a human woman portrayed by Jennifer Aniston. In a normal world where things made sense... all of these things don't seem far-fetched or fantastical... in fact... they seem totally normal and it is shocking to me... after listening to this song... that there really wasn't a Gremlins 3. Why wasn't there?
There's only so many questions a person can ask... but at some point, a lot of the people being asked about where the Gremlins went have to start responding. Joe Dante, etc. It's not just Nick asking this...many people wonder this... not just him... they really wonder where the Gremlins went... and at some point we deserve answers.
If this builds steam, I hope they don't forget about this song, I hope if there ever is a Gremlins 3 that this fellow gets to be Desmond in the film... the child of Gizmo and Jennifer Aniston. That's got Oscar written all-over-it, that role. All over it.
Gold
Conner O'Malley!
It was closer than I thought to choose between N. Lutsko and C. O'Malley... it was down to the wire... but in the end I have to give the Gold to O'Malley.
Look, I don't know how to fully explain what I'm gonna write next... but... in the Comedy World... if you've lived in it long enough... you tend to regard laughing as a reward more than a bodily function.
I have many laughs... I have the "Oh, I see what you did there, that's smart and biting!" reward laugh. I have the "Oh... okay, you tried, it was a good try, I will laugh now" not wanting to make someone feel like they're not funny laugh... I also have the "Oh good one! You got me!" laugh in response to infantile practical jokes or other tomfoolerishness..... as well as the "Wow, that was great comedy! I'm gonna reward you a lot with laughter" in response to observing really top-quality stuff.
I guess what I'm saying is... people who have inserted themselves into a comedy-oriented existence tend to get jaded and used to it at some point... and the laughs, even if genuine, are sort of an auto-pilot function rather than a true primal bodily function.
Now, why I gave him the Gold... is that a character he has on Twitter... made me laugh in the primal non-controllable sense. I wasn't "reward laughing" when I first saw him preform his internet character... I laughed because I had no choice... I couldn't have controlled it even if I wanted to.
The character was Corb... an affable yet somewhat unlucky (though some would argue Corb is lucky) fellow Conner portrays on social media... who finds himself in very specific trouble that is very modern and of the times. Corb is a floundering buffoon, a character template from an older era placed in the troubles of now... and it is something.
The first introduction to Corb was the "Man who Can Communicate with Trains" video. I wouldn't be able to watch that right now... even though I know all the things that are coming in it... without laughing. I wouldn't. It's that good.
Recently, there was a second Corb adventure.... and I gotta say... I really think this character is the Voice of a Generation. Yes, he's "out-there", Corb, and he's not necessarily a role model for young people... but dang it... you can't help but root for the guy.
Now, unlike the other two entries there's no link to the video because it does have some "shlock" elements of "toilet humor" and by that I mean genuine toilet humor. So, if you want look at these Corb videos up ... you should be fairly warned that it is Toilet Humor City. I haven't seen this much total toilet humor since probably Poultrygeist.
I don't really know why it caught me so off guard, with my laugh defenses down, my stone-like exterior cracked and I laughed not as a reward for comedy well-done but because I was unable not to. Corb just hits you from the start and doesn't let up... topping it up and topping it over and getting progressively more-and-more outlandish as the video goes on.
I don't think it's a character you can over-do... like if you get a Corb adventure every week... by the third one you'd be all Corbed-out and grossed-out... but every few months if this guy let's you know what complete whacked-out misadventure he's in.. as detailed in a click-bait news story... this character can live for years.
I wonder if it would work as a show. A Corb show. I'd watch it but I'm not sure how big the audience would be for it. It's beyond the pale in many senses. I like the character... I don't see him as a menace or a buffoon. I think Corb deeply cares about the world but he just has these human urges he has trouble controlling. I see him as a modern day literary character that is really a product of his time. I think it is much more deeper than people think it is. I'm a true believer in Corb and hope he can turn his life around and achieve his dreams!
Conclusion
Okay, so congratulations to all of our Young Guns of Future Celebrity Talent for their Twitter Awards... and I am happy that when the other 50% of celebrities I have heard of leave us... at least I have scouted the Young People World and know of a few that will still be around come 2035.
